雅思寫(xiě)作之中式思維范文最新
bicycle作者的思路是清晰的，但表達(dá)不明確，所以造成結(jié)構(gòu)混亂的感覺(jué)，考試時(shí)會(huì)吃虧的。
下面就是這兩篇文章。
Bicycles have become more and more popular in China. People ride bikes to their work places, to shopping areas, to schools, and so on. During the rush hours, you can often see a boiling sea of bicycles running in all directions. With the largest number of bike riders in the world, China is often referred to as the kingdom of bicycles.?
Compared with cars, bikes have many advantages（這應(yīng)該是主題句，在這么短的文章里應(yīng)該放在第一段）. First, they are not very expensive, and almost every family can afford them. （這句話分成2個(gè)句子比較好，一句是key point,一句做進(jìn)一步解釋）Second, they are very handy and convenient though they are not so fast as cars. With a bike, you can go anywhere you like, and you dont have to look for a large parking place. By riding bikes, you can avoid traffic jams and thus save the time and the money for taking taxis（同第一點(diǎn)一樣，但這一點(diǎn)思路有些亂）. Third, they do not cause air or sound pollution（?? Riding bikes does good to your health if you ride it regularly（這應(yīng)該是文章要論述的第四點(diǎn)，但沒(méi)有連接詞，又分了段，打亂了文章的整體結(jié)構(gòu)）. In modern times, people are usually too busy to spare any time for physical exercise. Riding a bike to your work place regularly serves as a good way to keep yourself strong and healthy. （2個(gè)句子的順序換一下比較好。因?yàn)榍懊嬉呀?jīng)說(shuō)了有益于健康，讀者等著聽(tīng)解釋，但作者卻換了話題。第一句話應(yīng)該是第二句話的原因。）?
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